Introducing Bram Stoker's Dracula...with a side mention of Twilight

Check out this short introduction to the novel Dracula by British literature expert Roger Luckhurst:

Do you agree that Stoker's novel is a "fantastic read" even though we're living in the 21st century, rather than 1897?  How does it compare in your mind with Stephenie Meyer's Twilight?

Dorian and Edward

     
          

As I've been re-reading The Picture of Dorian Gray and thinking about character, I've found myself comparing the dazzling Dorian with the sparkling Edward Cullen.  Apparently I'm not the first one to immediately think about the similarities (and differences) between these characters.

Check out this humorous entry entitled "Dorian Gray is Better than Edward Cullen" on fanfiction.com.

Or this blog entry entitled "If Dorian Gray met Edward Cullen..."

Care to share your thoughts on this dynamic duo?

Why is this Book Not About Zombies?

The answer to the title is, of course, that zombies are not sexy. I’d still rather read about zombies. Zombies are fun. Has anyone seen Return of the Living Dead? It’s like, the only zombie movie where they actually say ‘brains!’. It’s a great movie, in that campy making fun of it’s own genre kinda way, it’s definitely not meant to be taken seriously. Also, you know, rated R, has nudity and gore (duh) so YMMV.

Anyway. I used the 'd' word in this...is that ok? : /

Brief summary of chapter 3:

Edward saves Bella’s life; she procedes to whine the rest of the chapter about how it is SUCH a pain in the ass to have people show concern for her. I really get where she’s coming from, I mean here her dad actually told her mother that she was in a life-threatening accident! The insensitive swine! *sarcasm hand*

Edward practically has to put Bella on the rack before he can get a sullen ‘thanks’ from her. Cripes, woman, next time he’ll let the friggin’ car hit you and save half of an Amazon rainforest from being taken up with your pretentious-whine speak.

Bella starts having nighttime-reveries regarding Edward. However, they are not the suggestive kind…No, these are the pretentious, obscure, plot-related kind. Additionally, to her woe, Bella has become a person of exceptional interest to her fellow students, sheep-like peons that they are.

(The above sentences are brought to you by Meyer’s long-suffering thesaurus and my swiftly plummeting IQ.)

Really though, would it kill any of these characters to talk like actual people?!?! I’d ask for some Joss Whedon intervention but I am STILL bitter about Alien: Resurrection, so let’s just say I really hate Meyer’s dialogue. And also, her everything.

So Bella obsesses over Eddy for a while which, even she admits, is pathetic and mildly creepy. Well, ok, she says it’s pitiful. Close enough.

Then we’re treated to a weird scene where Bella tries to push all compassion and empathy away. This was a seriously bizarre scene…she rejects Mike and so is understandably feeling like a bit of a jerk and pities him a little. Now, pity isn’t great, but compassion and empathy are! These are good things to have when you consciously squash someone’s feelings and I’m baffled as to why we are expected to view Bella’s repression as a good thing.

Oh, and now she admits her obsession with the corpse is unhealthy! Welcome to the world of the sane, Bella.

Wait, we’re back to her world again:

“‘It’s better if we’re not friends’….

I’d heard that before.”

Um. From who? She’s never had a boyfriend and apparently not a whole lot of friends either since she left Arizona without referencing concerns for anyone but her mother. (and herself, of course) Maybe even her imaginary friends don't like her wordy, self-obsessed, complaints?

Then, to continue with this lovely picture of an over-dramatic narcissist Bella accuses Edward of regretting saving her life.

Pause.

Let’s analyze this a moment, shall we?

Bella claims that someone who saved her life now regrets it (which is basically saying he wishes she were dead) simply because he doesn’t want to be friends.

Seriously? What. The. Deuce. Pretentious, over dramatic wench! I would SMITE you if ONLY YOU EXISTED! WHY do people think this chick is a good role model? We haven’t even got to the bad stuff yet… sigh

Then, page 76 there’s this sentence…Bella’s talking about fixing up her truck and how she’d touch up the paint job if it had one when she mentions that Tyler’s parents had to sell their van to pay for parts.

As in…is that their only form of transportation? I don’t…why does this not bother her??? She freaks out if people express mild concern but if someone sells their CAR for her it only gets a passing reference?

And let’s ignore the fact that I hate Bella; this is just bad writing. This is why these books are soooo un-Godly long. Because of needless inane crap that’s included for two reasons

1) To help immerse the reader into a blatant self-insert universe.

2)To disguise the fact that these books have ZERO plot. (I mean we haven't even got to the vampire part yet!)

So apparently Tyler has a new car and his family is not destitute, and he asks Bella to the dance. Bella is horrified that 3 guys would dare ask HER to the dance and throws a little fit cuz, you know, that’s what she does.

Page 79 begins Bella’s unbelievably aggravating lists of ways in which Edward is simply divine and SO much better than her. Unfortunately, my give-a-damn is broken.

Bella gripes some more and agrees to give Edward the honor of being her ride to Seattle. The corpse insists upon warning her multiple times that she should stay away from him – while offering a chance to be in close proximity.

And I’m banging my head against the wall at the idea of people thinking this is what a healthy relationship looks like.

Completely unrelated:

My Sobe bottle cap says 'Sunday Night Dinners'...why?

Just getting started

OK, Now that it's mid-term, I finally started to get into Twilight. So far, so good. Much better than a root canal. I do find myself more interested in this as compared to the other stories so far, due to the fact that I have been up to Fork's and knowing the terrain helps relate to Bella. (Rain, Rain, and yes, more Rain).

Edward is obvious a blood sucker, but he has somewhat of a conscience. He has repeatedly told Bella to stay away from him, but as with most people, we are attracted to the things that may be the most harmful to us. 140 down, 358 to go.